Two Things...

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This week, I thought I would show off a talent of mine that not a lot of people know about.   I wasn't even that sure about it!!

I can sew!

I had a valance with two side panels downstairs in the front room.  They were like a creamy color.  They weren't dirty or worn or anything, I just wanted a change.  This picture is really of Maggie -- I always forget the before picture! This is kinda old, too, I just noticed the rug is a different color now, but you get the drift!

So, I changed them.  I decided to go with the colors on my new sectional in that room; burgundy and beige.  I know, still kind of bland but a little color. This is just who I am.  Note the new rug (not really, its like 5 years old!)!!

So, I didn't want to throw the old draperies in the trash, but I had no place to use them....unless I could transform them!  Transform them, I did!  A friend of mine, Ruthie, had made me a valance and a cushion and some pillows for the top of my stairs nook area.  This was probably like 10 years go!!!  She did a great job and I loved them; but when I found I had new 'fabric' in the old draperies, I thought I could perhaps change things around.  So, I, with little sewing experience, of course unless you count all of the Halloween costumes I made for my babies, got out the old sewing machine and went to work.  Are they perfect?  Well....no.  Are they perfect to me?  Oh heck yes!!  Trent was even impressed!   I don't have a before picture (see note above) of the stuff Ruth made me, but here is the after. Not too bad, if I do say so myself.

I know, right?!?!  Grandmama would be so proud of me - she used to sew all of my things that needed sewing...like buttons or hems or holes or pockets.  But, I did this all by myself with no pattern!  Well, I did use Ruth's old fabric as a pattern I guess.  Thank you Project Runway for teaching me to sew!!!  

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How many times do we judge a "book by its cover?"  

I think, in literal terms, I judge a lot of books by their cover.  I will go to the library (not so much physically anymore as I check out ebooks online) and just browse.  Sometimes a title may jump out at me or the picture or even the just the color of the book flap.  I will pick it up and read the description and if it sounds good(ish) I will check it out.  This has been a good way to discover good books and new authors whom I would have never known about had I not judged the cover.  

However, on the flip side of that, how many books have I loved but hated the cover?!?  Lots, I am sure.  I cannot come up with a example or two off the top of my head, but I am positive I have "looked" at a book and thought, noooooo...it doesn't look good.  Then maybe someone will ask if I had read this book and explained that I needed to because it was so good.  I may reply that I had looked at it but it didn't really look good, so I passed.  But what didn't look good?  The black book flap with plain white lettering?  Maybe the simplicity of the title?  I don't know....maybe it just didn't feel right in my hand.  This is the case where judging that book was a mistake.  I mean, yeah...sometimes I will read the book and it did suck and I will be like, "Darn it, I KNEW that book was gonna suck!" 

Natalie recently started classes again for this semester and she texted me on the first day.  Her first text was about the teacher.  I can't remember exactly what she wrote, but some of the context read, "old, boring snore fest."    The next text I got was something like this, "I love this teacher!!!  He is a funny old man!  He is a retired Captain of the Stockton PD and was head of the Investigation Department.  He is really smart and has so much knowledge to share."  She made the mistake of judging that old-man "book" by his cover.  I wonder if she would have taken the class still had she seen him prior to signing up for it and thinking perhaps she needed a younger, hipper professor.  She would have missed out on a great class (really, this is still to be determined, but am being optimistic, though!) with a great teacher who has lots and lots to share.  

I can think of several times when perhaps I judged a bit too harshly or too quickly - this is really a bad thing.  I don't think I ever would have been friends with my friend, Michelle, had I decided to go with my initial judgement of her.  I thought she was rather stuck up and a little librarianish.  I just knew she would not be any fun!  But, she really is fun.  She has a very smart mouth and a very sharp tongue...I don't think a lot of people know this about her, but I do.  Though I didn't on my own befriend her; we were thrown into a church job together and really we had to get along.  But, once we got to know each other it was great and I believe we will be lifelong friends.  

Since my life as turned many corners, I really, really try not to judge anymore.  It is so easy to look at someone and decide instantly what kind of person this is or whatever just by the clothes or the hairstyle or the makeup or whatever.  I wonder how many great friendships I have missed out on because of this.   I wonder how many great conversations I will never have because of this.  I wonder how many people I would have helped but didn't because of this.  

Now, I just look at people and smile or whilst standing in a long line strike up a conversation or add a comment to something they have said.  It feels good.  I met a really wonderful woman just by being nice and listening and smiling and perhaps answering a question about some pink yarn.  My friend, Mary, and I have gone to pie and have kept in contact through Facebook and I hope to meet up with her again soon.  My daughter, however, wonders often who this new person is!!  This fun and outgoing and so nonjudgemental person.  Who is she?  

She is me.  

XOXO

Two Things...

The two things today are simply because I would much rather blog than work.  I didn't say it was productive; I just think it is more fun!

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I was thinking the other day...yes, you probably should be worried... do you know when you go to a movie theater during a matinee and you walk outside after the movie is over and you can hardly see?  You know, the light is just so bright you have to literally close your eyes.  I wonder if that is what it is like when you die.

The after-movie sunlight is far brighter than most other sunlights.  I wake up every morning and I hardly ever close my eyes and squint because the light is so bright.  It may take me a minute to adjust, but the brightness is not really a factor.  But when you walk outside after sitting in a movie theater for a few hours, it is like someone turned the sun up like 100%!

We have heard people talk about "near-death experiences" and the bright light for like ever.  I wonder if the light is so bright, that we have to squint and shield our eyes.  I wonder if that is why some people choose not to go to the light because of the brightness.  Maybe there is a fear of the unknown there or perhaps the light is just too bright and those people just turn away for one-split second and that one second, half a second even, is enough time for you to be pulled back here.

I wonder what would happen if the "bright light" was not so bright.  What if this light were like the morning sunlight, bright, but not blindingly bright.  Where we have a moment to adjust our eyes, but not shield them or cover them or even look back, but just a moment to blink and look ahead.  I wonder who we would see.  I wonder if there would be less talk about the next life or the hereafter or the bright light if it just wasn't as bright and people could see to the other side and just go. If I saw my Daddy there and he had his arms outstretched and waiting for me to run into them like I was a 2-year-old again, I would go!  I can't think that I would even hesitate.  I might regret it, the minute I took the first step; you still being conscious of this life, of this world, of my family and friends, all the things that I have left to do...

Then, I settled onto this thought -- Perhaps that light is so bright because the world behind us is so not.  The contrast between the bright and the darkness is so dramatic it makes the darkness look darker and the brightness look brighter.  We are leaving a life where there is sadness and pain and heartache and sin (yes, my life also has joy and happiness as well, duh...that just doesn't work with my scenario) into a place of pure bliss.  We don't feel pain.  We don't miss those we have left behind, because they are on their way. We don't worry about money and bills and what's for dinner.  We see our family and our doggies!!  If we have lived a life that we were expected to live and do the things that were expected of us to the best of our ability, notwithstanding our mistakes and our fall backs and the times we didn't actually choose the right, we will see those who have gone before us and know things that we long ago forgot.  And then the very next minute, we can turn around and outstretch our arms for the ones we love.


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I have a couple of thoughts about my next thing, but I decided to keep it little lighter than that above!

I was online the other day looking at houses for sale and I could not believe how many of the listings had pictures of pretty decent houses but they were dirty. Maybe not like hoarder dirty, but not clean!  Like there was a bedroom and the bed was not made.  What?!?  Do I make my bed every day?  Certainly not. Would I make my bed if I were going to take a picture to try to sell my house? Ummmm...yes!!  Do I always put my folded laundry directly into drawers/closets?  I wish I did, but I don't.  Would I put my folded laundry away if I was taking a picture to sell my house?  YES!!  Do I mop or vacuum every day? Actually, I do vacuum every day -- Ralphie the Roomba takes care that for me! But if I were taking a picture to sell my house, I would not only vacuum but probably steam clean!  I would not only mop, but get on my hands and knees and scrub!!   The pillows would be fluffed and air would smell like cookies!  You maybe can't smell the cookies, but you certainly would be able to think you could!

I don't know, I just found this odd.  Just clean...or at the very least just pick up!  I wont look past the dirty picture (*snicker* I said dirty picture!) and think about buying your house, I will simply click on the next listing.  No, my house is not stage-ready to sell, but it could be in like ... I was going to say 5 minutes, but more like probably 2 hours; but even 5 minutes -- that is just enough time to make the bed and throw the clothes under the bed and pick up the big, noticeable pieces off the floor and put the dirty dishes in the oven!  And,,,no, mother, I have NEVER done any of those things!!!  I may have thrown clothes back into the dryer, but I am not admitting anything!!

Just a little side note here... I can't remember where I read it or heard it, but I read once that you should leave your vacuum out and by the front door.  That way, if someone drops by unexpectedly, it either looks like you were just about to clean if your house is dirty or you had just finished if your house is clean!    Or Phyllis Diller once said that she opens the door with her coat on; that way she can either say she was just getting home or just leaving -- depending on who you are!  And, again, mother, no, I have never done either of those!


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So, we have learned today to walk into the bright light and to clean your house before you take a picture (even a selfie; but don't get me started on some of those pictures with crap in the background!!).

XOXO

Those Moments

You know, I think every person in their lives have those moments.  Those special moments where you know you are going to remember this for the rest of your life.  Good moments...bad moments.

Some moments have deep impacts on us.  Some, we can look back on and just laugh and laugh.  Some, cry and cry.  Perhaps, some we wonder why this is happening to us.  Some so great we want to close our eyes and relive them over and over again.  Some so very terrible, we wonder if we can ever forget them.

The birth of my children are two of those events.  I wish I could relive them again.  I wish I could remember exactly every single minute.  I can't.  I can remember how scared I was with Garrick and the emergency Cesarean section.  I can remember the details of finding out I was in trouble, my baby was in trouble, being wheeled down the hall whilst catheters and IVs were being pushed into my body.  Waiting in the operating room for the surgeon; trying not to push...I could go on and on...*smiling* It was a great moment, in retrospect.  The one thing with Garrick that I can look back on laugh about is how he looked 3 months old in the baby nursery.  Those little 6 pounders!  Yeah, right!  I remember with Natalie is was easy and smooth.  There was no anxiety, no rush.  It was a perfect planned Cesarean section.  It snowed like half a foot the night she was born, the hospital was kind of shut down, no one was lurking around, the staff was like on half staff.  It was quiet.  Me and my precious baby girl were in my hospital bed and I was telling her how wonderful she was and how good of friends we were going to be.  I could write 1000 pages of the births of my babies.  Special moments that I hope I never forget.

I remember that terrible moment when my mom called and told me my dad had had a heart attack.  I remember being with my friend who had just lost her son and thinking no, no, no please let my daddy be okay.  I remember talking with people that day and being told everything would be okay.  I remember the exact moment my mom called back and told me they were air lifting him to Albuquerque.  Then the next call telling me he was too bad to make the trip. Then, the last call telling me he had died.  I wish I could forget that day. Everything about it.

There are special events like getting married and my children's graduations.  My brother's wedding.  When my grandmother died.  When we bought our first house.  When my son rode his bike for the first time.  When my daughter played basketball and called herself "Natalie Michael Jordan Wood!!"  When Sarah Smyle was hit by a car and died.  When we moved from New Mexico to California.

There are moments when someone has said something to me that has hurt me beyond anything I have ever known.  Almost ripped my heart right out.  Whether intentionally or just by letting something slip.  Words hurt, deep.  Being told I had an agenda or I was stupid or poor or ugly.  Or a bad mother.  Certainly moments I wish I could forget.

We all have those moments.  The good, the bad, and the ugly.  Moments we want to remember forever...moments we wish we could forget.  Maybe even moments we wish we could have back and do them differently.

I hope to have many, many more moments with the people I love.  I hope 95% of them are so wonderful I never want to forget them.  I would have asked for 100%, but no one can have that perfect of the life...or can I?

XOXO

Two Things...

Two things....

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So, I painted all weekend. Painting is hard work!  I don't think it matters if you paint like 1500sqft or 300 sqft -- it is all the same work.  You have to trim...well, first I had to repaint the white baseboards.  I tried to just clean it, but, no.  So, I painted all the baseboards white.   I taped off the shelving and around door.  I had to take the blinds off.  This used to be my son's room, so he had his "collections" on the shelves which I finally packed up and boxed up and they are ready for a move!  That was hard work, too.  Then I had to wait until the next day (I don't know if I actually HAD to wait, but my gosh, I was exhausted!!) to continue.  The first thing I did was "outline."  Trent HATES this part, so I am actually pretty good at good.  I used an edger thingie and I just edged the gray paint up to the white trims.  Natalie, thank heavens, decided to help me out. While I trimmed, she got a brush and did the corners and around the shelving and started on the closet.  All I have to say about the closet is that it has four walls, it is just as hard to paint as like a regular room.  It is a room, just smaller, but still four walls.  Well, actually one full wall, two partial walls, and one header (?). But still...I was glad Natalie is young and generous!

After we were done with the outlining, we both grabbed a roller and had at it.  I forgot to mention, the walls were like a very dark green, forest green (I am not sure WHY I let Garrick paint the walls so dark; I am surprised he didn't need Prozac while he was living here!) and I went to a lighter grayish color.  We got the first coat on and ....that's right, ran out of paint!!

At that point, we had a decision to make.  Put on the shoes and run to Home Depot all stinky and painty and unshowered and unmade up and hair undid (!) or shower, get ready and take advantage of a Saturday afternoon and shop and then run to Home Depot.  I wont even insult your intelligence; we all know which option was chosen!!

However, we did not wait until the next day!  I was like, "What time do you work tomorrow?"  Jo replied, "Eleven in the morning."  I asked, "Do you want to help me in the morning or after you get home?"  To which she replied, "Are you kidding me, neither.  I am not painting before work or after work."  So, I asked, "Well...do you wanna finish it now?"  To which she replied, with a very long, audible sign, "Okay."

So, we gave the walls a second coat.  We brought the new furniture up from the garage.  We moved the bed and put on the new bedding.  We put the bookshelf back.  We plugged in lights.  We put the new candles on the shelf.  And we called it a day!!!  

Here is my new guest room formally Garrick's room!   Gotta say, I love, love, love it.  I want to move in there!  

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I haven't really kept too quite about losing weight.  I have mentioned it a few times.  However, the other day someone I love very much told me I should be proud of my accomplishment.  I am not ever really proud of anything I have done (except my kids....I am really proud of carrying them for 9 months (8-1/2 for Natalie) and giving birth and watching them grow into exceptional adults!).  I don't really know why, I don't like attention, I guess, and I don't like people complimenting me because I really don't know how to accept it.

Anyway, so I went to look for a before and after picture.  I do not have one picture of my full body from before.  Not when I started to get heavy. Everything is waist up.  I don't think this was a conscious thing, because I was actually very surprised that I did not have one photo.  So, on my phone, I had recorded the ice bucket challenge thingie last year, so I snapped a still shot from that video to get the before photo.  This was in 08/2014.  My heaviest weight was in 10/2014. So, the before picture is probably actually about 5 or so pounds less than my heaviest weight.  

The after photo is my in my goal pants!  I am about 35 to 40 pounds lighter.

Someone I hadn't seen for a few months who I saw at church, told me that when she looked at me, she could tell from my neck and face that I had lost a lot of weight.  My allergist last week printed off my weight history for the last year because she was so surprised at how much I had lost and how great I looked!  I am proud that I am 2 pant sizes smaller and still shrinking - although I am not dieting really any more.  I have made life changes.  

I actually can't put all the credit on diet and exercising. I was under tremendous stress the first of the year.  I always thought I was a stress eater - and I am - unless the stress is almost unbearable, then I am a stress starver.  I was running back and forth to the hospital, running my house, running my business, being a mom, being a dog owner, mowing lawns, doing laundry, being both husband and wife in my house.  However, in the last 3 months I have really exercised and though stress may have taken some poundage off, the exercise (Body by Jeanne!! (she made me say that!)) and the dieting have kept it off and have made me more fit.  I am probably in better shape physically than I have been in the last 10 years or so.  

So....tada....here I am before and after!

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I lied, three things!!

I am getting my hair cut (and dyed!!)  this week.  I am very seriously thinking about cutting it short -- well shorter.  Maybe a bob to my neck. I can't go any shorter than my neck because I have a skin issue (I have a blog about this issue that I have kept in my drafts for a long while, one day I will be brave enough to speak of my skin issue, one day).  I have grown my bangs out, which I actually hate. Really, I hate not having bangs.  I wanted to just cut bangs again but then I started to think just about cutting it all.   We are talking about 10" from the longest point to the shoulder.  I mean, I have played a bit with the length over the years, cutting 4" or so and then letting it grow...but 10", that is a lot.

I would love, to go this short ...

I think that is so pretty...but I know I can no where near pull off this look!  That's Ruby Rose, BTW...she's beautiful.  But maybe a bob to the neck.

I don't know.  I go back and forth.  If I got my hair cut yesterday, it would have been shorter.  If I got my hair cut today, it would be the same length.  I just don't know what I am going to do.  Bets are, however, that it will look very, very similar the end of the week as it does the beginning of the week.

Maybe a change would be good -- However, I HATE change!!!  Such is life.


XOXO

Velvet