Monday, May 20, 2013

Another Year?!?

I just can't help it...I get excited around my birthday.  Around Christmas.  Around my children's birthdays.  Around vacay time!  I just get excited!  I can't help myself! In fact, I have pretty much renamed May to the Month of Velvet or commonly known as MOV! 

This year, though....45.  Oh my gosh.  Forty frickin' five?   When did this happen?  I remember being a young lady in my 20s....I had babies, two of them!  I had a waist, a defined waist!  I had eyes without lines!  I had clothes that were size single digit!  Single frickin' digits!!  I had hair that was all brown, nothing else, just brown!  I could jump, literally, out of bed and run to find out what was wrong with my crying baby.  I could walk the beach without stopping.  I could vacuum the floors without wheezing.  I could climb stairs and not wonder how...many...more...steps....are....there???  I could speed in my car and know I was probably cute enough to talk my way out of a ticket!  I could look at Junior clothes without being judged.  I could get out of bed and not hold onto the small of my back and stretch for 15 minutes before standing up straight!  I could, literally, run to the store!  I could read small print without the aide of another pair of glasses!  I could eat anything I wanted and still button...my....pants!  I could reach around and zip up my own dress, all...by....myself!   I could put my long hair up in a cute ponytail and swing it from side to side!  I could giggle!  I could stand from a seated position without noise!  I could just walk on by the wrinkle cream in the store.  I didn't know what heartburn was!  I could go to a restaurant with my husband and look at all the babies and smile when they fussed and cried!  Medication?  Everyday?  What?!?

But, alas...I am what I am.  I am a 45-year-old middle-aged woman who has two grown children, an empty nest, and a dog!  I've certainly come a long way.  I know the importance of family and good friends.  I know how wonderful it is to laugh until you cry.  I know the heartache of regret.  I know all the should haves and could haves and what could have beens.  I know the hurt of death and saying goodbye for the last time.  I know what it means to forgive and to forget.  I know the dark, blue days will pass.  I know what love feels like.

I know what if feels like to know I'd do it all over again. 

Age, really, is just a number.  That old saying that you are as old as you feel is true.  Some days, I feel all of my 45 years, sometimes I only feel half of them!  Getting older (and wiser?!?) every year sure beats the alternative. 

XOXO

Velvet

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